Making up my mind to be happy

I’m not a person that wears emotions on my sleeve. It’s not that I don’t feel them, but the outward appearance is admittedly low. My family makes fun of this fact, often accompanied by robot noises.

In my defense, I claim it to be stoicism, but it’s more likely that I simply relate with Elsa from “Frozen” when she sings “Conceal, don’t feel.”

Despite this fact, overall I do feel happiness. My life is very comfortable and, despite always wanting to better myself, I do have a feeling of contentment. Maybe I don’t show it enough, but those emotions do exist. What I find difficulty with though are feelings of joy, excitement and ebullience.

For a long time, I thought that was just a personal issue. While I tried to rationalize that the lack of elation was balanced out with a lack of melancholy as well, I was still privately bothered by the fact that I didn’t get truly excited over much.

I recently read an article in The Washington Post entitled “Fun is Dead” that made me feel a bit differently though. The focus was that we live in a world where we have forgotten how to have fun. While fun and excitement are similar, they aren’t exactly the same. However, it made me think I might not be alone.

People are increasingly looking for ways to better find happiness. Podcasts like “Happier” and “Ten% Happier” are incredibly popular. Books such as “Joyful” and “You, Happier” are best sellers. Newspapers, magazines and the internet are full of articles and advice columns on how to find joy.

I can’t help but wonder why. Were people decades earlier happier? Or were they looking as well? Maybe we simply aren’t as content with being content as we once were. Or perhaps we are lacking a happiness once more commonplace.

While happiness is difficult to quantify, that is exactly what the United Nations has been attempting to do since 2012.

The World Happiness Report examines every nation and surveys citizens, using criteria such as GPD per capita, social support, life expectancy, generosity, perceptions of government corruption and freedom to make life choices.

This year, the United States scored as the 15th highest nation on the happiness scale. That sounds good considering there are 195 nations in the world.

However, when you consider we are a nation that was founded upon the principles of individual liberty and are today the most industrialized nation in the world, you have to wonder why there are 14 others ahead of us.

Clearly this ranking was not an anomaly either. Since the first report was issued in 2013, the United States’ highest ranking has been 14th, with the lowest being 19th. While we may not be happy, we are at least consistent.

The more local we get, unfortunately, the worse it gets, too. Kentucky ranks 47th out of the 50 states on the happiness index.

Considering our job market is strong and our real GDP growth is in the top 15 states, clearly the economy is not the issue. So what is it that makes Kentucky so unhappy?

I think there probably are a lot of factors. It’s no secret that we’re not a healthy state. As a friend of mine was known to say, when it comes to health statistics, “Kentucky is always near the top of the bad lists and always near the bottom of the good ones.”

Another factor, which often goes hand in hand with the health issue, is we are still an impoverished state. Our per capita income is only 65% of what the national figure is. Nearly 17% of Kentuckians live below the poverty line, which is worse than it was at the beginning of this century.

The biggest contributing factor, in my opinion, though, is what I often talk about ... the decline of community.

Every year, we seem to grow more isolated. What has been handed us in convenience can also be a detriment. We shop Amazon rather than going to the stores. We have a wide selection of sports to stream on ESPN in high definition, keeping us from going to ballgames. We even increasingly worship “together” in our pajamas watching our own churches on YouTube or Facebook rather than attending in person.

These conveniences can be great for many, but on the whole I think we are feeling the detrimental effects.

I’m typically not one for New Years’ resolutions. I’m not a fan of feeling like a failure before February. However, this year I’m going to try something new. I’m going to find more joy. I’m going to make a concerted effort for happiness. And I’m going to shock my family by showing it more.

As Abraham Lincoln said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” And my mind is made up to be very happy.

Tommy Druen is a syndicated columnist who resides in Georgetown, Kentucky. He can be reached at tommydruen@gmail.com.